Beautiful, Wild, and Unexpected - Molly and John's Birth Story

Our birth was beautiful, wild and unexpected but we would not have been able to peacefully surrender to it had we not worked with you both. We will forever be thankful for you women!

At 33 weeks I started experiencing surges that began to progress throughout the week. One evening the surges became more intense than usual and we decided to start timing them. When we realized they were 2 minutes apart for over an hour we decided to go to the hospital to be seen. My OB diagnosed me with gestational hypertension and confirmed that I was in prodromal labor. Due to the diagnosis our OB requires a mandatory induction at 37 weeks and bed rest up until then.  We left the hospital with an induction date set for 27 April. 

Initially I was upset and felt very defeated. I felt that my body had failed me despite how much mental/physical work I was doing to prepare for birth. My heart wanted a natural birth but my body was trying to tell me it had other plans. I took the rest of that weekend to allow myself to feel all the emotions. My husband and I agreed that although it wasn’t the birth we had planned, we still would be able to lean into the Hypnobirthing methods. 

Leading up to the induction date I would listen to the recorded scripts twice a day and would spend time each day picturing a positive birth scenario with our new circumstances. When the induction day came my husband took me to the beach (my place of peace) and we listened to our Hypnobirthing and Christian Hypnobirthing scripts on repeat. The Hypnobirthing method not only helped us prepare for birth but it strengthened our relationship. 

Day 1:

We checked into the hospital at 1030 PM still with a plan to go as natural as we could but also ready to accept change. I received my initial cervix check at 1130 by a resident OB and was told I was 3cm and that they would not  be introducing any induction methods that night to see if my labor would progress. 4 hours later I received another check and was told I was at 4cm and was offered a membrane sweep (this was painless so I became skeptical) and I accepted. Up to this point I was still having irregular surges but was comfortable. 

Day 2: 

At the 8am shift change I received my third check and unfortunately was told I was 0cm and the resident must have been mistaken from the other night. Instead of a fearful or angry reaction to the news my husband and I were able to calmly make a choice in how we wanted to proceed with induction. 

We decided to begin with Cytotec which was given to me orally with increasing doses every 4 hours to help ripen my cervix. The first dose I was met with intense surges that came every minute for 4 hours. I spent that time listening to the scripts or worship on my birthing ball and getting up at the top of every hour to take a lap around the hospital room. The second dose the surges seemed to let up but I was experiencing severe nausea and vomiting that did not let up until I was off the Cytotec. We proceeded with the Cytotec for 4 doses before moving to the next induction method. At the end of the 4th dose I was at 4cm and received a true membrane sweep. (Totally felt that one!)

Prior to starting our induction our doctors and us agreed that mechanical manipulation of my cervix was completely off the table. I had been fearful of this method and knew in my heart I would need more assistance with the pain than I was ready for. However we knew after the Cytotec that most likely the use of a balloon to ripen my cervix would be the next step. Our doctors kindly let us have a 4 hour break after the Cytotec to 1. See if my body wanted to continue ripening on its own and 2. Let us rest up. At the end of the 4 hour break my cervix had not changed and we agreed to begin the mechanical ripening.  

At this moment is where I truly felt my Hypnobirthing experience beginning and felt God truly working along side us. Without either of those I do not believe I would have had the ability to peacefully surrender to what my birth journey was going to be. After the ballon was inserted the nurse would come in every 30 minutes and rotate the ballon 10 times (5 each way) until the ballon fell out on its own. Our nurses did this a total of 5 times until the ballon fell out and I was 6cm. 

After that procedure my surges became more frequent and stronger so again the nurses decided to see if my body could continue on its own for a few more hours. At 10 PM I was at 7.5 cm and my nurses offered to break my water. After talking it over with my husband we agreed to have my water broken but had also decided it was time to get an epidural. At 11pm I was given an epidural and shortly after the nurse broke my water although it was just a small trickle.

Day 3:

At 4am I received another cervix check and during that time I had a massive gush of fluid which is just what my body needed. At 8 am I was at 8.5cm and the nurses decided to start me on Pitocin. At this point I began to develop a high grade fever from my water being broken for so long so they started me on additional medication. Every hour until it was time to push my husband and nurses would help rotate me from side to side while utilizing the peanut ball. I reached 10cm at 11 am and began pushing. Our sweet Lola Jean was born at 12:43am on April 30th at 7lbs 7oz 20.28 in. She spent 2 days in the nicu for fluid in her lungs and was a fighter from the very start. 

Although my birth was not what we had originally planned, we would not have had such a positive experience in a unknown environment had we not worked with our doula using Hypnobirthing methods. 

Things that really helped me:

Recorded scripts 

Christian Hypnobirthing app 

Worship music 

Birthing ball/peanut ball 

Aroma therapy 

The MOST supportive partner 

The MOST amazing doula team 

Kassandra and John's Birth Story

My water broke at 4:30pm on December 7th. John and I went on a mile long walk to try to kickstart contractions at 5pm because nothing had started. When we got home, I took a shower and contractions started but were very irregular. When I got out I ate some leftover lasagna and bounced on my birthing ball while timing contractions and John showered. By now, I had to walk through the contractions. Sitting or laying down was so uncomfortable so I did laps around our kitchen island with the dogs following closely behind.

By the time John got out of the shower, contractions were about 4 1/2 minutes apart, lasting 1 min each so we headed to the hospital. Let me tell you, an hour and a half drive while contracting was not a good time and contractions got to the point i could not talk through them so I knew we were progressing BUT we got to the hospital around 8:30-8:45pm. In triage I was 5cm/ 100% effaced. Contractions weren’t giving me much of a break in between so they did registration and got me in a room.

By the time I got to my room it was about 9:45 pm and I was 8cm and baby was at +1 stations with contractions back to back so they wouldn’t even let me get in the tub.

About 20 min later I felt the need to push so we got me on my side and 4 contractions later and about 10 min of pushing, she was out!

Super tiny second degree tear was stitched up and we got 2 hours of undisturbed time to bond with her and feed her before any vaccinations or measurements of any kind.

Once that happened - she was 7lbs 7oz and 20in long and we were moved to our recovery room!

We came home December 9 around noon (it’s normally 24 hours for a vaginal delivery but they wouldn’t discharge us at 10:30pm so we stayed an extra night).

Recovery has gone well, she eats and sleeps like a champ and is such a snuggle bug. We stare at her in awe multiple times a day and can’t even believe she’s ours and she’s here.

🥰

What to do when plans change.

By nature I am a planner. I tend to lean towards a Type A personality. Although, over the years, doula work has certainly taught me to find the balance in life and there are certainly things that happen beyond my control. Since moving to North Carolina, we have been in what I feel like a constant season of change. And yes, it has been difficult at times to reign it in. Especially when we come to a point where answers lack and uncertainty looms overhead. In the past 2 years Hurricane Florence devastated and displaced many families in our area and left kids out of school for months to my oldest daughter experiencing a life changing car accident. Addingto the unknowns, my husband dropped retirement papers after 28 years of serving in the Marine Corps. Only to watch the years in the military catch up and physical ailments set in. We are currently awaiting a back surgery that will alleviate a lot of pain he has experienced over the past year. I also made a big decision to homeschool my youngest daughter. I am very thankful I did, given the current world situation. Even in the midst of not having many answers, I do my best to let God show me how to bring balance to our home and try to provide some solutions to problems we face.

Which leads me to sharing a few of these solutions about this time many are finding themselves in and making the best out of a difficult situation.

With many places running out of supplies like toilet paper and wipes. We might have to get creative by making our own products and being intentional with the time we have at home. I hope some of these ideas inspire you to research more about what you can do to improvise when we are without.

Homemade Baby Wipes.

I love Pinterest. There are so many options to explore. I found this this recipe from Swaddles n’ Bottles that may be helpful for you. It does call for paper towels, however, if there is a paper towel shortage, I would explore other options such as buying cheap wash cloths. It may make for a lot of extra laundry. But if it comes to it, I would make it work.

Homemade Baby Food.

When my kids were little, this is one thing I did do consistently. I loved knowing exactly what was going into their food. It was simple and actually really easy. Now this was before Pinterest and even Amazon. I used a recipe book gifted to me and a simple food puree maker. Today, there are so many options. It’s almost overwhelming. So I will leave it to you to find what one works best. If you find yourself running short on baby food, look into purchasing some fresh produce and starting there.

Here is a good website to start with. How to Make Homemade Baby Food: 27 Tips, Hacks, and Recipes

Homemade Sanitizers.

When the stores are running out of Lysol and other sanitation products, I may find myself making my own. I found a bunch of awesome recipes online at Wellness Mama.

Keeping our Sanity

For those with school aged kids or even in childcare, we may find this time home with the kids out of our normal routine. Keeping the kids engaged and entertained can sometimes feel overwhelming and stressful. They are probably experiencing some of the stress of change too. Which is never easy. Start off your day with a nice walk or some exercise. Go outside and enjoy the weather if it’s nice. If the kids are old enough, have a talk with them about some of the things going on and how everyone needs to work together and help around the house. Give them little chores to do and encourage them to not argue with one another.

Have quiet time. Even though my kids are older, I find quiet time can still be just as important. If it’s drawing, reading a book or resting, I believe it’s important to have some down time during the day. I think they call it being bored. At least that’s what my kids tell me know.

Keep a good bedtime routine for the kids. For me personally, I need that hour to come down from the day and invest in myself. Whether it’s reading, catching up on some work, or watching a television show.

Mom’s check in with your friends and family. We might not be able to hold playgroups for the time being, but having some adult interaction can help us all. Your spouse may need to make some adjustments too and understand that they may need to be the one to listen.

Overall

I hope some of these suggestions can be useful during this time of our lives. While my plans have been changing more often these days, I find that I can have some control of how my home functions on a day to day basis and that my kids feed off of my stress. I can be creative and find ways to think outside the box. I don’t know what tomorrow brings but I am walking by faith as we move forward.

Keeping everyone in my prayers!

The links in this blog are NOT affiliate links. They are my personal, researched recommendations.

Sonny and Kailey's HypnoBirth

I woke up Friday morning at around 0530 and knew that something was different........

 I had been having warm up surges for a few days now but they were a little stronger and more consistent. I was 40 weeks and 5 days so I knew this could be it and with the excitement about meeting our little boy I was praying it was. My husband had already left for work so I sent him a text letting him know that I was having these surges, not to rush home but to keep his phone on him just incase. At about 10:00 am I decided I should lie down and take a nap and surprising I slept great and woke up about 2 hours later with more intense surges. By the time my husband got home around 2:00 pm the surges were getting stronger and I started constantly thinking about them. We decided to get out of the house and go to a store to walk around since it was raining outside. This helped get my mind off of the surges and pass the time. During our little shopping trip the surges got to the point where I would have to stop walking and lean against my husband, but I would just breathe threw them. Our friends invited us to dinner so I figured it would be good to get out for one last meal, baby free! When we got to dinner around 6:00pm I started timing my surges. They were about 30 seconds long and only about 2-3 minutes apart. My doctor had told me to head to the hospital when they were a minute long and 5 minutes apart. I knew I wanted to stay out of the hospital as long as possible so we stayed at dinner. By the end of dinner around 8:00pm the surges were at least a minute long and about 2 minutes apart. My husband and I both decided it was time to head to the hospital. I was checked when I arrived and was told I was 2cm dilated. The nurse recommended going home and coming back when there was a definite change in my personality. When we got home all I wanted to do was lay on the couch and I wanted my husband near me. At about 10:00pm the surges were very intense, I began telling my husband I didn't want to do it anymore. He was so encouraging and continued to reassure me that I could do it. He also knew this was time to get to the hospital. When we got to the hospital I was checked again and was 6cm opened, I was admitted and my doctor was called. I was so happy that things were moving along so quickly. I was given a hep lock and told I could walk around or use the birth ball but all I wanted to do was lie on my back in the bed. During each surge my husband would remind me to breathe and would even breathe with me, which helped so much. He kept me calm and reassured that I could do this. When I wasn’t having a surge I would allow myself to just relax, space out and almost fall asleep. This allowed me to save my energy and keep calm. Within the next two hours (I lost all track of time during labor) I felt my water break twice. The nurse checked me and told me I was 8cm dilated and was moving along great. Just a few minutes after that my body took over. I wasn’t trying to push but my body was doing it on its own. My husband paged the nurse and she knew it was time. The midwife on call and other staff all came in with all the equipment. My body would naturally push when I would have a surge and then the staff and my husband would remind me to breathe and calm myself in between. My doctor came in and put on his gloves and with a few more pushes our son was born at 1:24am. He was handed to me for skin on skin, was alert and absolutely perfect. It was the most amazing experience of my life. It wasn’t easy and there were moments when I wanted to give up but using the HypnoBirthing techniques and my husband’s support I did it. I couldn't have imagined a better birth!

Sonny and Kailey
Okinawa

Favor's Birth Story

I started to tackle my birth plan about a month out.  Living in Japan I knew my options were limited, a birth center etc. wasn’t really feasible with the amount of paperwork and translation necessary for citizenship, same with a home birth, so the hospital was about it.  But even with a hospital birth – I learned just how much control you can have if you are informed, turns out – knowing really is half the battle. 

Our decision to hire a doula is where the path split – to the one less travelled by Westerners today, but more travelled by women throughout history – the path that lets your body lead and says “body – you are amazing – do your thing” instead of“oh, how I fear you.”

Our doula, Amanda, this beautiful calm presence came into our life and introduced me to hypnobirthing; a surrender to and acceptance of the natural process of birth.   For me hypnobirthing was not about hypnosis, but about letting go of fear, embracing what the body is designed to do, and connecting with God and letting Jesus’ strength in my weakness be made manifest in this miracle experience. 

As Amanda taught me about birth, two powerful images stuck out to me, one - that if you can relax, and remove fear, your body will produce oxytocin and help you with your pain and two – a story of a woman who gave birth while in a coma – her body knew what to do, and since she wasn’t conscious to fight it – it was free to birth, this was powerful to me.  I learned about general hospital interventions, what is done, when and why, and I could see just where that train derailed … very very early – and very very easily if you aren’t aware and committed to keeping it on track.  As people inevitably told me their horrible birth stories, time and time again I could see when the track was switched over, being aware was so important.

Amazingly - I went into labor on my due date, I spent the morning grocery shopping in a packed grocery store before Thanksgiving, went to the park at 3pm where my water broke (which I was convinced I had lost control of my bladder and was actually peeing myself) I called Chris at 5 to come home, took a bath, tried to track my contractions and called Amanda at around 7pm.  Contractions were not clear to me, I couldn’t understand what was what, but I had a sense things were progressing.

As I laid on the bed I remember my whole body tensing rigidly, like a hard wave of rigor mortis arching my back and overtaking me – hesitantly I thought it may be time for the hospital. The drive to the hospital was pivotal – I put on my relaxation CD and this is where I began to feel how to birth.  If I could relax, if I could let my hips sink down instead of rise up – I could sit through the contraction without my body tensing so hard – it was possible.  Chris thought I didn’t have a single contraction while driving and that we would be sent home when we arrived, but on that drive I found how to let them roll over me, instead of through me.  My mind was repeating “oxytocin, coma, Your strength Lord” over and over, it took all of my concentration, and was laborious in its own way, but was a world away from that rigid body tension I had felt before.  We arrived at the hospital and I walked to the delivery ward with a pacific Amanda holding my hand while Chris parked the car.  It probably took me 20 minutes to go the few floors, stopping every minute or so to let that contraction roll over me, swaying, holding on the wall and swaying some more.  We arrived at triage, still swaying, with water pouring out of me, apologizing as I was convinced I was peeing all over the floor.  And so I swayed, waiting and waiting for a woman with a UTI to be seen, my silent demeanor my not have been to my advantage at that point.  When the nurse finally came over, to her surprise, and maybe all of ours, I was 6cm dilated; oh – to a room you go!

We checked into the room at 9:20pm –Chris held my hand as I laid on my side, eyes closed, in my black splendid stretchy dress I bought at a BlueBee sale years before, never knowing it would be a cozy partner on this special day.  Again my mind repeated “oxytocin, coma, Lord Your strength” until I was overwhelmed with the urge to push – and I thought this was wrong – I thought I had let a contraction come over me like on the bed at home and that I could no longer relax and resist it, but Amanda said it was OK, and with minutes to spare the doctor was called in.  Once I had the OK to push, I pushed with all my might, and in 4 or 5 pushes – a little Favor Anne made her way on out, at 10:20pm, 1 hour after being admitted. Thank you Lord, and hello little squishy baby-like being.  Chris and I were shocked, it was so fast – and then there were three. 

I never experienced the ring of fire, or got close to ever wanting medication, when I was pushing I felt the ripping and kept saying “oww, owww, owww” but that was the worst of it, and then getting stitched back up – I felt all of that.  Immediately after she was born the nurse asked if I wanted Pitocin to birth the placenta, but with my insistence she let me try on my own, which took only a few minutes – I think.  I’m not really sure – it was a bit of crazy shock – the moment that your family changes forever and you meet this little person who will be such a huge part of your life – who knows what else is happening.  We just laughed, it was so fast, and here I had birthed what appeared to be our baby J She laid on my chest, all white and squishy, welcome to our family little one - let’s just stare at each other for awhile.

I had become convinced early on that I wanted to try to go natural because I thought that the birth would be more painful, but the recovery would be easier.  After my education in birthing and my experience, I am convinced both were easier.  I believe my God made the body and made it to make and birth other bodies, capable of amazing things. 2 Tim 1:7, For God did not give us a spirit of timidity but a spirit of power.

Rachel's Birth Story

My husband and I had been in Okinawa for only a few months before I found out I was expecting. Back in the states, I gave birth to my son at home and had the privilege of having an AMAZING midwifery team, so naturally I was looking for a similar experience with my second here. I was so disappointed to find out that there weren’t any American midwives and that I would need a translator for the single Japanese midwife on island who services Americans. I wasn’t completely comfortable with that, (not to mention, it would be a bit of a strain financially,) so I decided to look into other options.

Pretty early on in my pregnancy, a friend mentioned that they had seen a car decal for something called

Oceanside HypnoBirthing and Doula Services. I had already been seen at the Kadena clinic and was considering giving birth at Foster with a doula since the possibility of birthing at home seemed to be severely limited. I contacted Amanda Dodson and she ended up being the best thing that happened to me during my pregnancy! Her support (before and AFTER birth,) encouragement, and genuine desire to see a mother empowered by childbirth was a fundamental part to my wonderful birth experience. She helped me look into different local options (Yui clinic,) and supported me when my husband and I decided (after much prayer) to give birth at the new Foster hospital. Most importantly, she helped reaffirm my suspicion that childbirth could be an enjoyable event.

Let me give a little background. I had a relatively short labor with my oldest (9 hours) but very painful. My contractions came right on top of each other, and though I had the support of my wonderful husband and previous doula, I was completely unprepared mentally. My water had broken over 24 hours before active labor started, and I was having prelabor contractions for almost as long. I was timing them at 5 minutes apart, and being a first time mom, thought I was in labor. My midwife and doula arrived to find an anxious mommy who clearly was not in active labor. They made my husband and I breakfast, checked me (I was barely at a 2,) and told us to rest up because the baby might not be coming for a while. Shortly after they left however, I went into active labor. I remember crying in the shower because I didn’t think there was any way I would be able to handle real labor if it was already so painful. I was completely discouraged from the get go and even after my husband called them to ask them to come over, I didn’t realize that I was actually in labor! For me, the checks in the beginning were discouraging as well, and as I neared the transition, I felt so out of control of my body that I began to panic. Thankfully, the urge to push came quickly and I was encouraged to push in whatever position was most comfortable. For the first time since my labor began, I felt strong. After my beautiful boy was born, the midwifery team weighed and checked him out, cleaned up, cooked us some dinner, told us goodnight and that they’d be back in the morning. I didn’t realize how wonderful this was until I gave birth in a hospital setting! But I’m getting ahead of myself...

In any case, this time around, I knew that I wanted to not only give birth naturally, but work with my body rather than feeling powerless. So first, I asked to be seen by a midwife for my prenatal appointments. I was scheduled to be seen by a midwife (which ended up being a total blessing.) I was very upfront about what I wanted from the first appointment and she essentially told me that I had the right to birth how I wanted to, and that if I wanted an all-natural birth with no interventions, then I could do it. So, I wrote up a birth plan and asked her to show it to all the OBGYN and midwife staff so nobody would be surprised when I arrived. I also began to prepare myself mentally and emotionally. Amanda gave me a list of positive birth affirmations as well as a list of bible verses confirming the strength God gives us to do what He created our bodies to do. I spent a little bit of time each day reading over these verses and affirmations, reminding myself that childbirth does not have to be a fearful experience. I bought myself a special birthing gown and a candle with a calming scent, body butter for massage during labor, and had a playlist of worship music that I had listened to during my daily quiet time. I also spent a lot of time in prayer, asking for the Lord’s strength and His peace when the time came to bring my little girl into the world.

Several days after my due date, a Saturday, I started having prelabor contractions. I tried not to get my hopes up because I hadn’t had any sign that my water would break anytime soon. Not to mention, I had a prenatal massage scheduled for the next day and I really wanted the baby to wait for that! Anyway, on Sunday, the contractions became more frequent and at 6 pm I had the first sign that my water would break soon (you moms know what I mean) an HOUR before my massage. I decided to go anyway. Those poor Japanese women when they found out I was contracting through the whole thing! My water broke on my way out (thankfully not enough to get everywhere) and when I got home my hubby and I put our son in bed and sat down to watch some tv. At about 9 pm, I started having active labor contractions. We put on the music, turned off the tv and the lights, and lit a candle. I found leaning over my birthing ball helped tremendously with contractions and my husband put counter pressure on my back as well. I focused on the music and breathed deeply; working with my body each time a contraction came. I was completely at peace, a HUGE difference from the labor I had with my son. When the contractions started to intensify, I had my husband call Amanda and she arrived sometime after 10 pm. She encouraged me to drink water, put pressure on my back when I needed it, and did some light touch massage. Her presence was extremely calming, and we found ourselves laughing and joking during labor (something I had heard of other women doing, but couldn’t imagine after my first birth experience.) Around 11:30, my contractions picked up and became very intense. We decided to call a friend to pick up our son so we could get ready to head to the hospital. I could tell I was transitioning, and was starting to feel some pressure at the end of each contraction. It seemed that bending over something was the most comfortable position, so I ended up leaning over the backseat of our car with Amanda beside me still applying counter pressure to my lower back. We got to Foster in probably 7 minutes (My husband FLEW down 58!) and I walked through a contraction to get inside the hospital. We headed up to labor and delivery, and by the time we got there the contractions were coming strong and hard every minute or so. I told the charge nurse I was going to need to push soon so I needed a room. She insisted that we had to check into Triage and was not happy when I declined having any type of blood work or IV. She responded with, “Well, this IS a hospital.” I told her that it was on my birth plan and I would sign a waiver if I needed to. She left the room and I continued to work through the contractions, though I was

a bit more stressed out at this point than I had been before. When she came back in, she wanted me to lie on my back to do a check. I told her no because I really didn’t see the need for it. I was obviously in full blown labor and I was feeling a lot of pressure at the end of each contraction. She seemed baffled and left the room again. After some time passed and my contractions became stronger, Amanda brought up the point that doing one check might get me into a room more quickly and eliminate the risk of giving birth right there in Triage. I agreed to do one check but asked the nurse not to tell me how far along I was. (I knew that if I was at a number that wasn’t as far along as I thought I should be, I would become discouraged and labor could slow down.) Thankfully, she just said that they were going to admit me to a room though it wasn’t time to push yet. When we got to the room, I assumed my leaning over the bed position, trying to breathe through contractions. At this point a male OBGYN entered and told me that he had looked over my birth plan and everything was agreeable except for the fact that he was a man (I had asked for a midwife or female OBGYN and absolutely no males in the room besides my husband until after the baby was born.) Apparently there were no other females on duty and my midwife was on a trip to Tokyo. I knew the baby would be there soon, so I told him it was fine. He began to explain why he wanted to put in a heplock (with no running fluid) in case of emergency. I told him that it was in my birth plan not to have one, and again that I would sign any paperwork I needed to. (Also, in case you’re wondering, the reason I declined the IV is simply because I have given birth before without one, and I get very anxious over needles. I knew having one would be unneeded and would just stress me out, which is something I definitely wanted to avoid.) Well, anyway, he didn’t seem very pleased by this and left the delivery room. Not long after, I started feeling the urge to push (I must have only been in the delivery room 10 minutes.) The charge nurse looked over at me and exclaimed, “Are you pushing?! Honey, if you’re pushing you need to tell me!” I responded with, “I’M PUSHING!” Someone darted off to get the OBGYN and the nurses told me it was time to turn around and lie on my back. I told them no, and continued pushing. I became vaguely aware that there were two male corpsmen in the room as I delivered leaning over the back of the bed. (I found out later that the OBGYN had never delivered in the position, and I’m assuming this is why I “needed” to turn over.) In any case, Nicolette Raene came into the world perfectly healthy at 8 lb. 4 oz. with no complications or even a tear. To their credit, the staff at Foster Naval hospital followed most of my birth plan and allowed me to do skin to skin for an hour afterward. They didn’t hassle me about declining vaccines, eye drops, or the vitamin K shot (though I was told they didn’t have the oral supplements as an alternative, which was untrue. She was given Vitamin K orally after she was seen by the pediatrician.) However, one of the major wishes they violated was allowing the corpsmen into the room. There honestly was no reason for them to be there as I delivered because I was doing skin to skin for an hour afterward, and they were only there to wash and weigh my daughter. Amanda even reminded the charge nurse that I had asked for no males in the room, but her comment was brushed off with, “Well, someone needs to be here for the baby too.” I don’t believe that nurse will ever realize how much she violated me with that rash decision. Not only did she take away my right to decide who was present at MY birth, but she also allowed other men to see me exposed, something that is exclusively shared between my husband and myself. I know it may not be a big deal for some women, but I’m tired of a mother being told to suck it up and get over feeling embarrassed by having strange men see her at the most vulnerable time of her life.

Anyway, the stay afterwards was unfortunately not all that great either. The rooms and meals were nice, but co-sleeping was not allowed and sleep in general was limited with how often the staff came in to do vitals on both myself and my daughter. (Oh, and the water in the shower didn’t get warm! How bizarre, right? I was freezing and shivering when I went to wash off after birth.) Also, they really like to violently poke their hands into your stomach periodically so that you “heal” faster. Ugh. Anyway, though I am thankful that my daughter was healthy and that I was not forced to do anything against my will, I have concluded that I will never give birth in a place where protocol trumps a mother’s rights and emotional wellbeing.

All in all though, my labor was wonderful, and whether you’re birthing at home or in a hospital, you really can be empowered by your experience. Nothing compares to looking back and knowing you were strong for your child, that you took charge of the labor process and brought your sweet one into the world.

In the end, I would suggest a few things for expecting mothers. First of all, be well informed. Do your research and stand up for your decisions. Don’t allow yourself to be treated as if you’re stupid or don’t know what you’re doing. Listen to your body! Take the time to prepare yourself mentally and emotionally, and have a support team. (I would highly recommend a doula!) But most of all, never lose faith in your God-given ability to birth a child and in the One who gives you the strength to see it through to the end.

Rachel