Military spouses are uniquely positioned to serve in this role. You've lived the lifestyle, you know the challenges, and you understand the support gaps that exist within the community. Becoming a doula allows you to use your lived experience to make a difference—while also building a career that moves with you wherever the military sends you.
An honest and open review about the demonstration. I remain skeptical that any doulas were consulted or had a seat at the table, despite our numerous meetings and phone calls. There are only so many people one can speak to before realizing they all seem to lead back to the same individuals.
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I had one LONG and INTENSE contraction the whole time I was up and quickly went to go lay back down. I was feeling pretty sick and started to wonder if I wasn't going into the transition phase as I remembered feeling that way with Hayes. But I thought that surely it couldn't be the case as my contractions were still so inconsistent and not quite 2-3 minutes apart. I was definitely starting to lose control of my emotions. Nate was airing up the birth pool and I was feeling pretty concerned about everything that was happening. Just as I was having another contraction, my sister stepped in the door. I felt my water break, which I immediately told her, and I felt the baby’s head drop.
Military spouses are uniquely positioned to serve in this role. You've lived the lifestyle, you know the challenges, and you understand the support gaps that exist within the community. Becoming a doula allows you to use your lived experience to make a difference—while also building a career that moves with you wherever the military sends you.
On Thursday at work before HypnoBirthing class, I was pretty sure I lost some of my mucus plug and was experiencing light cramping. I had an ob appointment scheduled for the next day so I decided to wait and ask them unless things got worse.
On Friday, I told my midwife what happened and she asked if I’d like my cervix to be checked. She said it wasn’t necessary but if I was curious then I could know. I did want to know just to see if I should possibly be prepared for labor sooner than later. Sure enough I was 2-3 cm dilated and 50% effaced, but she said this could mean I’m having a baby in a few days or a few weeks. She said I didn’t have to come to the hospital until I couldn’t talk through a surge.
On Saturday and Sunday I was still experiencing some mucus like discharge but no real changes in terms of surges or pain. But then when I went to bed on Sunday night, I woke up a few hours later at midnight having surges (felt like back cramps) . They weren’t super strong and there wasn’t a clear pattern to how far apart they were, so I practiced my breathing we learned in the class and even listened to the script from the last class again. This really helped and I was able to get some extra sleep (on and off).
By 4 am they were getting stronger, so I took a shower to help and to get ready for the hospital. After my shower I woke up Jimmy around 445 and said he should probably get ready to go. We didn’t rush out the door, just took our time, and I think my water may have broken around 530. I went to the bathroom and it looked like my bloody show and lots of watery discharge.
We were on our way to the hospital by 6am and got checked in by 630. At this point admittedly, my HypnoBirthing practice went out the window a little bit. I had told Jimmy I was open to an epidural when we got to the hospital to help the pain and my breathing was not great.
When we went into triage my midwife checked me and I was at 8 cm. She told me we probably didn’t have time for an epidural and sure enough we didn’t. We got moved to a room shortly after and I could feel the pressure to push already. My midwife instructed me on what to do (I will say my mind was resisting the instruction to push when my body wasn’t telling me to at certain points but most of the time it was naturally coming with the surges anyway) but I powered through and with 3-4 pushes our baby was born!
I give all the credit to what Amanda taught us that allowed me to labor at home for so long, making my labor and delivery very short at the hospital. So thank you Amanda, and cheers to hypnobirthing! I wish you all the best with your upcoming deliveries. You got this mamas!
This year went by so fast. I can honestly say I feel like I blinked and here we are. January 1st, 2022.
There were a lot of very big changes for my family in 2021. We were barely coming out of 2020 and recovering from what seemed like a rollercoaster ride after my husband lost is step mom and the beginning fo 2020 and within a few short months, he unexpectedly lost his only brother. We kind of floated through the remainder of 2020. Keeping our lives a bit on the quiet side after my husband underwent a pretty big surgery in the fall of 2020.
Enter 2021.
We knew the first of the year would be a little slower and gave us a little breathing room as we knew once the end of spring came around it was time to jump on the freight train and hold on tight.
Our oldest daughter got engaged at the beginning of the 2021. We had a feeling it was coming. But I’m not sure if a parents heart is ever quite ready for trusting a young man with your daughter. It took my husband a little longer to accept the fact his daughter was growing up. I knew she was and ready to start watching her blossom into her womanhood. I am very proud of the young woman she is becoming.
My son graduated from high school and left for college in the fall. I am so very proud of him. He has really blossomed and is becoming such a respectable and honorable young man. I want to tell my clients to snuggle their little ones as long as they can, because time truly does go by quickly. I do miss him a lot. He will always be my little boy even though he towers over me by at least two inches. AND I AM 6’2”!
From that point it was non stop. Probably some of the biggest milestones of our lives happened just within a month of each other. My husband hung up is uniform and retired from the USMC after serving 29 years. This has been a huge transition for us. I have spent 23 years of my life traveling the world with him. It’s the only life our kids have ever known. And I probably wouldn’t be where I am at today as a doula and childbirth educator had the military of not provided opportunities to experience different duty stations and living overseas for the majority of our time in the military. We knew it was a long time coming and it was time to move onto the next season of our life.
Remember our daughter getting engaged earlier in the year? I forgot to mention they set their date for Nov 2021.
So not only did we have a retirement to prep for, a wedding was on the schedule.
I see why people hire a wedding planner. We didn’t. We should have. We will know better for next time. But I am ok if that is NOT for awhile.
On Nov 13th, 2021, we celebrated the union of our daughter and her new husband. It was a whirlwind and I feel like we are still trying to come down from it all.
Of course, in true doula fashion, I had a client on the books and she delivered a beautiful baby boy just a few days after the wedding.
Photo Credit to Jason & Kate Photography, LLC.
To say the least Christmas was pretty low key this year and we tried our best to just relax. Until we all got sick the day after Christmas. But thank goodness we are on the mend and finally feeling better.
I am now just taking the time to reconvene and start envisioning what 2022 is going to look like. By nature I am a planner, I like things in order with some structure and a plan. It has been a very big adjustment letting go of some of those things. More so on the business side this past year. I did have quite a few births throughout 2021 and there were some that really took every skill I had as a doula to support these parents as they had to fight for their birth. There were times I didn’t feel like I met everyone’s needs because of everything we had going on. I am truly thankful for the wonderful families I did get to serve. And that they were very understanding of the shifts and adjustments we were going through as a family.
I do have some apprehensions as to what is to come in 2022. Things have just not quite been the same since covid. But I will keep pressing on and lean on God as we navigate the road ahead.
