The Birth of Everly

I woke up with a "stomach ache". I went the the bathroom and then went back to bed to tell Jonathan. I couldn't sit still. I kept thinking "Oh, no! I cannot be having stomach issues, I could go into labor soon and I don't want to be sick!". After I went to the bathroom again I started feeling more consistent sensations. Jonathan kept telling me it was labor but I didn't believe him. I tried getting in the bath but it wasn't comfortable. This surprised me because through my pregnancy I imagined myself laboring in the bathroom for the majority of my time home.....

I couldn't go back to bed. I went to the couch and hung over the back. Jonathan and I decided we should call Amanda to let her know that we thought this could be it. We began timing contractions and realized they were forming a pretty solid pattern.

3:00 am Jonathan called Amanda and told her everything was progressing and that she should come. At this point I couldn't talk during the rushes.

3:30 am Amanda arrived at our house and I barely realized until she began talking to me. I remember smiling at her and trying to seem chill by saying "Hey". By this point I had reached active labor. Jonathan did great about setting the mood. There were candles and my playlist was on shuffle. I stayed on my hands and knees leaning over the back of the couch for awhile. I was very vocal during contractions. Amanda was great about telling me to release into them. I kept complaining about "my butt" and she would tell me that it was good and that the baby was doing the right thing. I thought for sure something was going to explode down there. As one of the Farm midwives said "Rushes are not painful but more of an interesting sensation you've never felt before and you have to adapt and learn to manage them.". This is so true. I never felt pain just something different.

5:00 am By this point I was restless. I felt that we needed to head to the hospital. I was scared to go though for fear that I wasn't dilated enough and I wanted to be home where I was comfortable. Jonathan began getting everything in the car. I remember getting upset because he seemed to take forever. This was the first time I really got upset about anything.

6:30 am I got up. Jonathan got my sock monkey house shoes. Which I remember thinking was sweet and also weird...shouldn't I be wearing real shoes!? We got me out the door and I remember feeling like I was booking it down the stairs. I just wanted to get there and not have a contraction on the stairs. The sun was just coming up as I got into the car. It was warm with a cool breeze; it felt perfect to me. I climbed into the back and straddled my body pillow and hung over the seat the way I had been on our couch. Just as I felt we were ready to go I thought to ask him if he'd gotten my ID (the joys of giving birth on another military base). He didn't. He had to run upstairs and grab it. I was a little ticked but he came in a rush. The ride went by fairly quick. The contractions in the car weren't too hard to manage but I just wanted someone putting pressure on my tailbone. I remember telling Jonathan "I need hands!!!!". He told me later that he laughed a little cause he didn't know what I meant at all. He did try to help by squeezing one of my feet. When we got to the hospital we got to park right upfront since it was so early. I rolled out of the car and waddled up to the entrance. As the 3 of us were walking a guy asked "Hey can I get you a wheelchair?". I think I responded with a "No, I'm fine". We got inside and took the elevator to the 5th floor to L&D.

7:30 am They took us to a triage room and checked me. I was 4cm dilated. I was extremely disappointed to hear this. I thought for sure I was 7-8cm. They hooked me up to the monitor and told me that I'd need an IV soon if I planned to stay or I could walk around. I began getting flustered and confused. I didn't want to walk. I wanted to get comfortable laboring in a room. I asked to go to the bathroom. It was nice to be away from the environment for a minute but I didn't like laboring alone. It was hard for me to pee and I was in there awhile. When I got out Jonathan and Amanda weren't there I got worried. I asked where they were and right about that time I saw them. They decided to go ahead and get a room for me.

8:30 am When we got into the labor and delivery room things began to get stressful. Right as I got comfortable on the birth ball (again hanging over the bed holding a pillow) doctors and nurses came in and started asking a million questions and telling me I had to have an IV. Jonathan had already handed them our birth plan previously and told them to refer to that as much as possible and to let him answer questions. The dr began to get upset that I didn't want an IV. I told her a Hep lock was ok and she didn't even seem satisfied with that. She began going over all the worst cases scenarios and saying "But what about your epidural" and "So you want your baby to die?". Up until then I had been calm but I snapped and said "Please cut out the negative language.". I think she got the picture cause she left and the nurse began digging for a vein for my Hep Lock. She dug around for about an hour when I told her I had to pee.

9:30 am I went to the bathroom alone and tried to pee, I couldn't. Right as I started getting inside my head thinking "I can't do this, I'm gonna have to play their game (epidural, etc)"; my water broke. Amanda and Jonathan heard it from outside the door. Amanda came in to check the color...of course meconium. I was a little upset. By this point my body took control. I started bearing down and I couldn't control it. Amanda warned me to try not to so I didn't hurt myself if I wasn't fully dilated. I decided I wanted to be checked because mentally I was getting exhausted but I was scared of a small number again. To my relief I was fully dilated!!!! Praise God. I got settled on the bed on my side (I wanted to be on my hands and knees but the doctor said no).

10:15 am Before I started pushing the doctor told me that the NICU team would be in the room because of the meconium. I didn't even care or really notice, I just wanted to get Everly out. I began pushing and I remember looking around and feeling so surreal about the whole experience. It had happened so fast and now it was happening! I pushed without coaching for awhile and began to feel like she was never coming out. Amanda started doing timed pushing with me and it helped a lot. Everyone was so supportive. I really wanted gravity to help me but I knew the doctor wanted me to stay put. Finally the doctor said I could reach down to feel her head. I didn't think it felt like much...I thought it would be a lot more. Everyone kept talking about how much hair she had and that got me excited. When I got to the end or "the ring of fire" that was the first "pain" I felt. But I embraced it for a few pushes and her head was out. I thought I was done but she had her hand up by her face so she was a little stuck. Everyone began yelling a little and that stressed me out but a few seconds later she was finally in my arms...at 10:51 am. She was beautiful and I was so relieved to be done. Jonathan was tearing up and I was just in shock but a wonderfully and happy state of shock. 

The Birth of Carson

I woke up just after 1:30 am on August 29, 2015, one day before my “due date”. This had become my average wake up time to use the bathroom and nurse Brendan back to sleep. I went to the restroom and when I stood up, I discovered my mucous plug in the toilet. This was my first true sign of labor starting. I had been having some warm ups the past week, but they weren’t frequent or strong. I did notice they were more frequent when I woke up; however, I went back to bed and Brendan woke up to nurse. There came a point, not too long after, where I couldn’t nurse him anymore. My waves were becoming too intense and I needed to get up. Poor Brendan was very upset about that, so he woke up for the day too. Somewhere between waking up and now I also tried to sit on my birth ball, but I honestly can’t remember when I did that. It didn’t help for too long. I continued to ride out the smaller waves and gave my doula, Amanda, a quick call. We decided to wait a little bit & that I should call her if things kept moving forward. I decided at that point to take a shower. I rode out some waves in the shower and then got out and continued to ride out waves in a hands and knees/child’s pose hybrid position. I called Amanda back to update her again, she suggested waiting 30 more minutes and seeing how things progressed. After my 36-hour labor with my first sweet boy, Brendan, we weren’t sure how fast things were really going. I asked Bradley to help me put on my TENS unit to try and relieve a little back pain and I tried to stay hydrated. The waves were starting to get pretty intense and I was having a lot of self-doubt crowding my brain. Brendan’s birth had not left the best impact on my soul and the anxiety from it was showing up. I tried to tell myself positive things and reached out to Bradley to help stay calm. 

It had been about 30 minutes and I called Amanda back to ask her to come to the house. Bradley was doing his best to help with what I needed, but I was really needing her help as well at that time. I also called Kristi, our photographer, to let her know what was going on and gave Misty, Brendan’s support person, a 45-ish minutes heads up. At that point, we all still thought we had a decent amount of time. Boy, were we wrong! I suddenly felt things start becoming more intense and felt more urgency for everyone to get to the house. I quickly called Misty back before Amanda arrived and let her know that Daddy would be picking her up sooner than I originally thought a few minutes prior. Amanda had also let Assonta (the doula shadowing her) know to head over. Time was kind of a blur by then, but from messages on my phone, Amanda arrived around 5 am and Bradley left to pick up Misty. I was still riding out a lot of pretty intense waves at this time. Self doubt still clouding my brain more than I liked. With the first wave after Amanda arrived, things started to change with my brain. She put her hand on my shoulder, and although that wave was very difficult, that simple touch was extremely calming. I continued to ride out some waves in the same child’s pose position on the bed. They were definitely intensifying and although my sense of time was skewed, it didn’t feel like I was getting as much of a break in between waves. We decided to get up and move out of the bedroom, as I had been almost stuck there for a little while. I made it to the hallway where the birth ball was when another wave came. I tried to lean over the ball, but had to get all the way down on the floor. I rode out a couple while on my side, with my leg on the ball, but once again needed to get back into the child’s pose position. That had become my comfort zone. Brendan was happily playing with Misty, whom recently arrived, which was a very big relief to me. I apparently hit transition right as Bradley got back to the house with Misty, because I got very nauseous. This was when everyone thought we should go to the hospital. I decided to have Brendan stay home with Misty, because he was having so much fun! As we all loaded up the cars, I had Bradley call Kristi to tell her to meet us at the hospital ASAP!

We then got on the road for a “short” 15 minute drive that we had made numerous times. This time was a whole other ball game. I wasn’t quite sure how I was going to make it through the waves in the car. I was no longer in a position that was comfortable. I was feeling quite a bit of pressure. I knew I just needed to do it, because I was not having my baby in a car. Not because I didn’t think we could handle it, but because we didn’t have time to do the extra paperwork with our upcoming move from overseas to the states. Bradley got us to the hospital as quickly as possible (I’m 99.5% positive he was speeding) and he went to grab me a wheel chair from the ER. Amanda and Assonta tried to get me walking towards the doors, but luckily Bradley came back pretty quickly, because I doubt I would have made it much further. I had my eyes mostly closed from this point forward and tried to focus. I tried my best to kindly express to the triage tech that I needed to be checked immediately, without any of the other stuff. This baby boy was coming quickly! The technician tried explaining that they needed to get me on the monitors and was giving the routine spiel. I don’t remember exactly what I said, but I remember looking at him and telling him in a semi-kind fashion that what he was saying would not be happening and that he needed to get a nurse right then and there. He

conceded and left. I got undressed from the waist down in order to be checked (my first and only check all pregnancy) and then waited uncomfortably on the triage bed. The time from car to birth seemed to drag on forever, but this all was happening in about an 8- minute time frame. My support system asked for them to get the nurse twice, the second time after I said I was starting to feel an urge to push. Kristi arrived somewhere around here as well. I remember looking up, seeing her, and telling her she could take pictures now. I highly doubt I needed to tell her that, but I think I was grasping at control wherever I could get it. The nurse came in, quickly checked me, told me I was complete and they started rolling me off to a room.

When they got me to the room (a short walk down the hall) they needed to get me from the triage bed to the bed in the room. They told me to ROLL. Seriously. Roll. I remember thinking that was the stupidest and most insane idea ever. It wasn’t, and I rolled from one side to my other. Amanda was right there with me through all of this. I felt like I always knew exactly where she was, which was comforting. After they rolled me, she tried to help me lift my leg so that I could try to birth on my side. I literally could not lift one leg off of the other. My body had locked my legs together and they were not coming apart in that position. She then suggested getting on hands and knees and I switched to that position. Then the technician came over and said he was going to start my IV. I remember just basically saying nope, that’s not going to happen. I got lucky that my provider, the head CNM, told him it was ok. All at the same time, the nurse grabbed the Doppler, got our baby’s heart rate (which was great), and I told Amanda that I needed to push. Working with my midwife, I pushed out our sweet boy in only a handful of pushes. As soon as he was out, I felt a wave of joy, relief, and pride as well as a little disbelief. He was born at 6:33 am. That’s right. The whirlwind that was this labor and birth was only 5 hours long. It took some time for my brain to catch up as I had prepared myself for another long labor.

My midwife passed him through my legs and into my arms and I laid down with him on my chest. I did it. I freaking did it. That is how I felt. I just had my natural, healing birth and I was on cloud nine. To make everything even more special, my midwife then informed me that Carson had been born en caul. I was shocked. I had heard stories. I had seen pictures. I just never thought I would experience it. The staff was also quite thrilled as most had never seen it first hand. Bradley cut the cord once it stopped pulsing, then we tried to get him to nurse. He waited probably an hour before he decided he wanted to. I got to sit there and take in every moment for two hours. Then, Bradley went home to get Brendan, the technician took all of Carson’s stats and did his checks, and I got up and went to the restroom. Then we sat back down and he started nursing again. Shortly after, Bradley came in with Brendan. I was ecstatic to see him and introduce him to his little brother. Kristi took a few more pictures and then everyone left us to enjoy our newest addition.

Carson felt so tiny at 8 lbs. 11 oz. and 21 inches long. He didn’t weigh much less than Brendan, but he felt small. A short 24 hours later we were headed home! This sweet, precious little boy is so wonderful. He adds so much to our lives. His brother adores him and so do we. I am so thankful for my support team that helped me bring him into the

world in such a wonderful way. Our one-on-one hypnobirthing classes with Amanda, as well as just her experience and presence were so crucial to the way everything went. I truly wasn’t sure that I could have the natural birth I had been dreaming of. But I did it. It was possible. And it was worth it! 

Learning from the sensei

I'd like to think that most locals appreciate the effort. Or perhaps they really think, "Why is this 6'2" American keep saying "Daijobu desu" or  "Dou itashi mashite" religiously. I believe I'll stick with my dear friend Kyoko who's been an amazing translator and colleague. So when my jokes and humor don't make sense to the staff, she can explain why I sound like an ding dong.

Photo courtesy of Dr. Fumi ( I forgot to take one with my phone) Christmas dinner 2016.

Back on track. I am feeling quite nostalgic today and have some time on my hands.  I figured I might as well sit down and share with you some of my experiences in Okinawa.

I feel very fortunate to build relationships with providers in the Japanese community. We even found a home birth midwife a few years ago! There is so much to learn about this amazing culture. When Yui Clinic was scoped out, it was through a couple of expecting friends looking for options off base. For many, the thought of giving birth off base was daunting and scary. Then being told that your baby will not be an American citizen and it costs thousands of dollars turns many people away. (Which this is absolutely NOT true, unless you have Japanese blood pulsing through your veins, you are not going to be a Japanese citizen. Financially, delivering out in town can cost around five thousand dollars but it's almost completely reimbursed by Tricare). The only time I've heard things being a problem is when a baby decided to come quickly and no medical professional was there to witness. Then the paperwork and insurance can be a bit of a headache.

Photo used with permission of the family.

What we found was a place that was not like many other places in Okinawa. I loved learning more about the birth culture of the country I lived in. 

The majority of my doula work has been on base. To which I am pleased to say the base hospital has been very open to supporting families in their births, doulas and birth plans. It surely does take teamwork. However, there are aspects of the Japanese culture I would love to see incorporated into our more American way of practicing. 

One major one would be warmth. Keeping a mother warm that is. I was always taught that if a mom is shaking after delivery, it's the hormones. Completely normal right? In time of going to the births at Yui, I've never witnessed  moms shake or shiver. When the woman is in labor, there's a fan and one can turn on the AC, but close to delivery it gets turned off. Yes, it may heighten the smell of birth and arm pits but its quite amazing to see the outcome.  I've also been told that staying warm helps a mother's body recover quicker and is good for circulation. Perhaps, it's the environment this takes place too. The rooms is often dark. Just an overhead light or the small lamp putting out just enough energy to facilitate whats taking place. 

The quietness. I swear the doctor and midwives are like silent ninjas. Even if special circumstances arise, the needs are met very quickly. While there's much commotion going on, people aren't yelling and orders coming from a million different directions. The atmosphere brings a sense of peace and calm to the life changing moment that's about to take place. 

A seasonal, traditional Okinawan meal served. Photo credit: Yui Clinic

The postpartum care. All I can say is WOW! Again, I can only speak for my experiences and other places may vary, but it is a common practice to stay in the hospital for about a week after delivery. This is something that I feel is so beneficial. A new mother is allowed to bond with her baby while having continued support with breastfeeding, fully prepared, nutritious  meals and baby care. They also receive postpartum massages, cranial sacral sessions and breast massages if needed. 

In my time here, I've also witnessed a cesarean off base, which many would be floored to hear what it was like, so I'll save that for another time. Let's just say it can be common to practice a very family centered/gentle cesarean. In the absence of a medical emergency of course. 

I know my families season is up here in Okinawa, but I have learned so much. Some of these places didn't have to open their doors to the American community. I have found that mostly they are very willing to helping. I may be leaving but I will have friends for life here in Okinawa. I wished we could build more of a bridge between our cultures because there is so much available to us. I personally drawn to Chinese Medicine, body work, homeopathy and have even acclimated to the warmth of the rooms. So get your socks on mommas!

Yui clinic staff 

Doula Days

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I began teaching my HypnoBirthing classes ; and letting people know that this class was not about ‘hypnotizing people’  but a method that taught  women how to relax and trust their body for birth.  We soon  began holding monthly meetings called Birth Talk.

HypnoBirthing Parent Picnic.

In Birth Talk classes, we would discuss a range of topics from comfort measures to  women making informed decisions about their birth. I really began to see women  being empowered during their pregnancies; asking questions to their providers, and they started taking in birth plans into their birth. These same women began to spread the word.

Our community was growing, and there was starting to be more of a need for birth doulas on Okinawa.  I was desperate for help as the need began to grow and I wasn’t able to fill all the requests for birth doula work. This compelled me to reach out to Geri my trainer from California, and she wholeheartedly agreed to come over and host the first ever DONA birth training in Okinawa. At first, I did not think too many people were open to doula work. 

I was overwhelmed at the response. We had two women join us from Iwakuni and about 14 women on Okinawa join the training. All I can say it was a huge learning experience.  With all the change and the doulas from Iwakuni wanting to expand their resources the Japan Birth Resource Network was established as a Private Organization. Birthing in Okinawa was reinvented and with the help of dedicated women wanting to grow the birth community. This not only have us a platform to reach families on a bigger level but create an accountability program for the birth doulas on Okinawa. There was a lot of learning curves and growth for myself. I had to learn that not everyone will see eye to eye with one another. I learned that in order to have a healthy doula community, there needed to be structure and continued training for those new doulas on island.  I felt in my heart of hearts, that no matter how hard I attempted to build bridges within the hospital that they were not ready for that door to be opened.  Yet with much frustration, I kept pushing through. I had to let the chips fall where they may. I continued to go forth with supporting and educating families in hopes one day the rumors, miscommunication and division would soon come to an end and we could go forth working together building a safe place for women to deliver their babes.

A lovely meal at Macarooni Grill

During this season, a couple of expecting friends began to explore options off base. This led to the finding of Yui Clinic. I cannot express enough the willingness on their part to open the doors to the English speaking community on Okinawa.  This was a much needed resource for women looking to birth their baby’s in a more homebirth/birth center setting. Over the course of a year I was able to establish a very good relationship with Dr.Fumi and her team of midwives. They would sit down and listen to what my hopes and goals were and establishing more resources for families on Okinawa. I began to see more options becoming available and resources that perhaps not many knew were here. Also during this time, many of the doulas from the previous training were PCS’ing or having baby’s of their own. We were back down to square one and began to explore having another doula trainer join us for another workshop.

Sarah Harre, a certified DONA doula, had contacted me and said she was moving to Okinawa. I was excited but not sure how involved she wanted to be in our growing birth network. Thank God she was willing and open to help. I basically told her where I needed the help and she jumped right in. I also got her going very quickly with doula work and before she probably was expecting it, gaining clientele and got voted in as Vice President of JBRN.

Sarah Harre has been quite an asset to this community. Not only as a sounding board for me but someone who I could confide in through some of my struggles as a birth doula. I have watched God strategically place people on my path that help this grow. Our board now consists of women who share the same faith and vision of making this network grow.  Sarah has been a great business partner in keeping the network flowing. Little did we know that we shared the same vision of opening a facility where we could provide resources to the military families?

We were in the making of holding another birth doula workshop. Linda Herrick agreed to join us. This was another pivotal point in the Okinawa birth community. This training allowed for 23 women to become trained as birth doulas on Okinawa. Linda was also able to travel to Yokosuka where she trained 5 more women.

The doors from this point on continued to open. The hospital had gone through some transitions and relationships started to be created within. We have a doula photo album placed up on the labor and delivery floor where families and staff could see the doulas within JBRN.

For a while God had been placing the thought in my spirit about opening a facility where women and families could come to find all around support. Throughout my work here, I kept seeing women fall through the cracks when it comes to not only education for birth but breastfeeding. There are over 100 baby’s born each month at our base hospital. At this time I had done a handful of births off base. I began to see the difference of needing that continual support that our American culture doesn’t always provide for families. I was seeing women leaving the hospital 2-3 days after delivery and having breastfeeding issues. I increasingly became more and more frustrated. One, I was beginning to see huge gaps in what our current options were. From having to qualify to be seen through certain places to current limited support for education and breastfeeding in others. God always has a plan, Sarah had briefly said something about how great it would be to have a one-stop facility where women could come and receive that continual support. To fill those gaps where it was needed. This was all an idea in Dec of 2014. Within a month God began to open the doors and it was amazing to watch everything fall into place. The connection I’d had with Yui, grew into their support in opening The Birth Education Center.  Kyoko, a good friend of mine and has helped with so much with translating and our birth adventures off base became a business partner and she invested into our dream of opening a storefront.

Within two weeks we found a building. We started building our resource team. Two very important women that joined us were Christy Googe and Maria Alexander. Both very knowledgeable with breastfeeding and have provided amazing support to women on Okinawa wholeheartedly joined our vision. Having done a lot of work with families on Okinawa already, it was a perfect fit. Since then, we've had people come and go. But someone has always stepped up to take the spot.  Everything has come together beautifully. A previous client of mine had a business of creating logos. She said to me that she wanted to share her talents with helping a business that God was establishing. I was so humbled at her offer.

Here we are. A  year into being open. It’s a huge faith walk. This is simply another chapter of a new season in my life. It’s teaching me to grow and trust in God at a whole new level. He has a plan for us and it’s been very humbling to look back to see how everything was building to point me in this direction. I am excited for what the future holds.

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 Japan Birth Resource Network Doulas. 

My message to you: We grow up in a culture where pregnancy and birth isn’t always valued. Many women feel left to their own devices to just figure it out. There is not a good support system in place to help families navigate through one of the most exciting and possibly stressful events in their life. Women leave the hospital and go home to a husband who returns to work not long after the birth. A woman’s family cannot always be present to help after, even more so here in Okinawa. I want our facility to be a safe place for parents to come and not find good education but quality care from others who can assist you through those milestones in life. We don’t have all the answers but we can listen and help to provide resources if needed. 

Okinawa to Washington DC.

I am excited to share with you about my trip to Washington D.C., adding more into my blog and what brought me to this point. 

The past few months have moved forward in high gear. I was nominated for the 2016 Military Spouse of the Year and won the Marine Corps Base Camp SD Butler here in Okinawa. Providing me the opportunity to go Townhall and MSOY Ceremony this past week. What an honor to be around so many amazing men and women with so a mission and organizaitions to support our military communities.

This was an eye opening experience and has really motivated me to push forward even more with bringing this resource to the states. Not only myself but several other women have worked hard the last 4 years  to bring awareness and continuity for our military families and those living overseas. My purpose has been set and I am driven to see this fulfilled. Networks are being established and connections are being made. 

Not many understand the lifestyle laid at our feet. Not to say other's don't have their struggles and obstacles to overcome. Having been a military spouse for 18 years, there have been times I've wanted to throw in the towel. Between long deployments, 30-60 days trips, holidays, birthdays and big events missed, I'd have to remind myself to stay strong. Fortunately, my husband didn't miss the birth of our kids, but I know many who have. I know many families who've had spouses barely make it home for the birth of their baby. I known women to experience the loss of their husband, not ever meeting their newborn. I've watched families get uprooted from our overseas location because of medical issues with her or baby, never to return to Okinawa. Literally leaving their house in someone else's hands to pack up and close the doors. 

I've witnessed the victories and heard the stories of families who've received help from myself and other doulas in our network. We've impacted only a small percentage of our island but there is so much more to do. To help fill the gaps where when the Active Duty Service Member goes back to work, a postpartum doula can be there. To provide guidance and support for a single active duty expectant woman, a mother of a deployed spouse, the birth experience where both parents can be there. This is a critical stage in a new families life and to have the support of a birth doula, postpartum doula, lactation counselor, etc., should be available to our military families no matter what duty station they end up at.

My mission has and always will be to provide resources and a continuity of care for families in the military through the use of birth & postpartum doulas and other birth professionals who contribute their life to this amazing work.

The Vision Begins...

“Habbakuk 2:1-3

I will stand on my guard post And station myself on the rampart; And I will keep watch to see what He will speak to me, And how I may reply when I am reproved.
Then the LORD answered me and said, “Record the vision And inscribe it on tablets, That the one who reads it may run. “For the vision is yet for the appointed time; It hastens toward the goal and it will not fail. Though it tarries, wait for it; For it will certainly come, it will not delay.…
I will climb up to my watchtower and stand at my guard post.
There I will wait to see what the LORD says and how he will answer my complaint.
Then the LORD said to me,: “Write my answer plainly on tablets, so that a runner can carry the correct message to others.
This vision is for a future time. It describes the end, and it will be fulfilled. If it seems slow in coming, wait patiently, for it will surely take place. It will not be delayed.””

The journey of becoming a doula begins with my purpose.

A purpose that I was not fully aware of or even the smallest interest in.

The  scripture above speaks to so many areas of my life.  It reminds me to on a daily basis to not jump into things God hasn't put into place but wait at my guard post for the next steps to take. 

As I look back on those times when I tried to rush things or do things my way, I would always have to bring myself back down to reality and remind myself that God has a plan. EVERY time He would show up. He has always shown up. 

In the past months I have felt every sermon I've listened too refers right back to this scripture. It's like God says: "Hello Amanda, I know what I am doing", "Are you going to be patient and trust Me?"

My journey to building this birth community in Okinawa began back in the summer of 2008 where God began with a foundation of being placed in the right place at the right time.  Even though my flesh was fighting the current situation and circumstances; opportunities were arising. A dear friend of mine was doing some doula work and would share some of her experiences. 

We were an active duty Marine Corps family and stationed in Texas at the time with orders to move to California. I was against the move as I had my heart set on moving back to Okinawa where we were stationed before, for 7 years. I wanted to return to Okinawa the first time because it was a safe place for my family and I. Okinawa was our first duty station as a married couple. I was only 18 at the time and my husband had just gone Active Duty from being in the reserves for 6 years. This is where both of my oldest children were born and lived the first years of their lives. This is where Scott came to build a relationship with the Lord. We had grown to love our local village and had fond memories there. When we had to leave and return stateside, it was a culture shock for us. We desperately wanted to return. We quickly found out it wasn't our time and season for this. God surely have other plans and we found ourselves begrudgingly headed to Camp Pendleton.

We were able to get settled and I found myself revisiting the idea of becoming a birth doula. I didn't know much more about that work other than what my friend had shared with me. I decided to take the plunge and enroll into a DONA Birth Doula Workshop with Gerri Ryan. Which by the way is an amazing midwife and has become a much-needed mentor in my life. There were several people God placed in my life  as connections along the way.

I was definitely on the fence about all of this birth stuff during and after the workshop. I had a hard time absorbing a lot of the information and how I could even see myself fitting into that community. I've not ever been familiar with a sisterhood type of bond. It was a little strange being around women who were very connected with one another and just seamlessly fit into that mold. I felt like an outsider, but deep down inside all this sparked my curiosity and definitely gave me some things to think about.

After my training, I guess it wasn't quite a season to begin working towards the certification. In 2009,  I really felt a tugging on my heart to get back into the swing of things. I was able to reconnect with Geri and take her workshop again. This as the pivoting point and God strategically placing that particular group of women in that workshop as connections and future growth in my doula career but become a childbirth educator. Care Messer just so happened to be one of those women who were planted in my life for that season. I joined the Operation Special Delivery, as a volunteer back in 2010 and before I knew it, I was initiated into the work as a birth doula.

Family circumstances came up which moved our family back to Texas while my husband was in a school for 9 months. During that time, I didn't do much but survive with my family and all the transitions taking place.  Doula work kind of got put on the back burner. 

After my husbands schooling was over, we packed up and headed back to California and the connections began! Care  Messer became a strong component in my growth as an educator and understanding the work as a birth doula. Care  had trained to become a HypnoBirthing Instructor and with her very direct, loving support basically told me I needed to become an instructor as well.  I decided to go forth with the motion because at the time I was doing doula work for her HypnoBirthing students. I was seeing the difference between families who would go into labor/birth educated and informed than with those who didn’t.  I’d like to say the rest is history but in actuality it was just the beginning of something greater. I had no idea I’d be where I am at today. I don’t dare compare myself to some of the greats in the birthing world like Ina Mays, Henci Goer, Rebekkah Dekker, Penny Simpkin, the list goes on. I do often wonder what they must have felt like when they saw a need for a change and against the odds, pushed and fought to speak up and make a difference. I feel like I am on uncharted territory. I’m not going to lie, it’s been daunting and there have been times when I've wanted to throw in the towel and give up. 

HypnoBirthing is one of those topics that some families are familiar with and some simply have no idea what it is, how it’s done, and if it even works. HypnoBirthing is a gentle and relaxing way to give birth. We focus on breathing, relaxation, visualization and how fear can be associated with birth.  We understand there are a lot of fears that surround birth, and believe those fears should not hold you back from having an amazing birth experience. You and your body work together through your labor, easing pain and discomfort. In Hypnobirthing, you are totally conscious and in a strong state of relaxation and engagement with your body. Your mind is still functioning normally so you’re aware of what is going on around you.

Birth partners also play an important role in HypnoBirthing. Fathers will learn many tools to help the expectant mother and education on how the birthing body works. The method teaches you that, in the absence of fear and tension, or special medical circumstances, severe pain does not have to be an accompaniment of labor. You will gain an understanding of how the birthing muscles work in perfect harmony--as they were designed to--when your body is sufficiently relaxed and you trust birth. You will learn how to achieve this kind of relaxation, free of the resistance that fear creates, and you will learn to use your natural birthing instincts for a calm, serene and comfortable birth.

This is where I truly feel like my story really begins. We got orders to come back to Okinawa. Yay! After spending seven years before on this island and having my oldest two be born here, it was like our second home. I was excited! I had some experience under my belt with doula work and ready to begin providing services on Okinawa.

It didn’t take me long after arriving to realize there was not much in place for doula services. I met a woman who was doing some work here as a birth doula and had a small group where those interested in this birth work would meet. Here,  I met a couple of ladies who would become a piece of the puzzle in creating foundation for information and support to families. 

It didn’t take me long to start acquiring clientele. Three months after being after landing in Okinawa, I had my first doula client. I was excited to not only start this journey here but I also had high hopes of reaching out to the hospital where my kids were born 15 and 12 years ago.  I think I may have taken the hospital off guard when I began taking information up there and leaving it at the nurses station and sharing more about what a doula does.  Work began to pick up to the point where I was taking 2-4 clients a month. I know God was looking out for me because not once did any of my births overlap. This was interesting because at the time there were only 3 birth doulas on island including myself. 

One of the women became a dear friend of mine and she ended up shadowing me at a couple of births for training.  The other doula worked full time and did some volunteer work. She helped where and when she could. But really it was us three actively working in Okinawa. There were a couple of times where the other two had to take time off and travel. I was the only actively working doula on Okinawa for what seemed about 9 months. During this time us; a couple of other women who loved birth and a postpartum doula really began to see a need to bring information and education to the local community. We decided to bring everyone who'd be interested in sharing their brith stories together and start our little group called Birthing in Okinawa. This was an opportunity to educate and inform families about options and provide resources here.

To be continued....